Let Me Be Clear:


When I was a child, maybe six or seven, I told my cousin that my favorite color was clear. He argued with me, exclaiming that clear was in fact not a color.   We pretty much grew up as brother and sister, loving and arguing as such. Rumor has it, I was an extremely bossy and demanding child, in which case not much has altered. Nevertheless, my beloved cousin and I made it through my dictator phase and recently reminisced over the phone about that brief, clear conversation during our adolescence. Cracking up at the transparent ridiculousness of it all, we ended the call. The urge to suddenly psycho analyze myself came over me.  

What was it about this quirky “favorite color” of mine and why would it make sense throughout the common theme of my life?

I was on it.

Clear.  Clear?  Clear!  Suddenly everything seemed clear as day.  Throughout my entire life I have craved clarity and even more so now that I am on a journey of finding my true self.  Understanding my story and the purpose of my set of circumstances, has become one of the driving forces that continues to keep up my resiliency.

Without going into too much detail, there were some befogging things about my youth.  An American with a British accent — Great Britt, my loved ones would call me.  My Mum was a teenager when she brought me into this world and just a short while later my biological father died at a very young age. Heartbreakingly, my Granddad soon followed, passing away from cancer that rapidly took him at forty-nine, leaving him to depart in a matter of months.

Cancer, son of a bitch.

Because I didn’t have a father in my younger years, before my Dad adopted me, my Granddad was my first love and his death was both devastating and confusing all at once. Many tragedies took place in the short amount of time I had been on earth and I didn’t realize at the time how much all of these events would shape me as a human.

Material items were abundantly gifted to me from the strong women that raised me; never leaving me without anything, especially love.  Even still, I always felt a pinch unclear about a lot.

Around the same time I had originally professed my favorite color to my cousin, I met my very best friend, Crystal.  Coincidence in her name? Perhaps. Or perhaps it was shimmering kismet.  My attraction to her from the very beginning was her ability to be completely transparent, even to this day.  She is the person that I can count on to tell me when I am making reckless decisions, or make me cry because she gives it to me straight instead of blowing smoke up my ass.  Tough love at its finest and as always, crystal clear.

Fast forward twenty plus years and my life’s mission is to expose myself; as open as the air.  Make the most out of myself, while welcoming people along for the ride.  I’m working everyday for a clear vision as to why I am here and a purpose as to how I have been blessed time and time again after coming so intensely close to death.

One thing is clear for certain; clarity comes from within, as well as the people you surround yourself with and exploring your core being. From there, life becomes as clear as the sunniest day you ever did see.


Britt xx

PS:  Thanks for the memories, Aust.  Clear for life. xx

My World in Preview:


Britt x

It’s Official: www.BeStillMyHeartBlog.com

It’s official.

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Be Still My Heart Blog is officially a dot com. A new year is upon us, as well as a new me and overall content of #BSMHB. I had mentioned previously that I was gearing more towards a lifestyle story, if you will, through pictures and words. Having cancer tends to throw a wrench into things at the most inconvenient times. Yet, I won’t allow that to set me back, babes.

Now that I am moving around a bit easier and the pain is lessoning day by day, I want to show the world how wonderful, colorful and interesting life can be despite having terminal cancer. (I am still writing about everything that recently occurred with my medical situation and wrapping my head around it all.  Blog to come on that…)

In lieu of that, to officially kick off the lifestyle variety aspect of my blog, including fashion, photography and blah, blah — you know, I have been collecting questions I have received via email and included some extra that you’ll hopefully jive with.

Q + A with Be Still My Heart Blog

Q: How would you best describe your style?

A: I’m drawn to anything that resembles the 1960’s. That’s an era in terms of fashion that I would have loved to be a part of. The 90’s grunge is also something I’m highly attracted to. I guess my style could be described as retro grunge. I’m going to make that a thing, although I’m sure it already is?

Q: Who would you say is your number one fashion inspiration?

A: Devious question because I have many. But the one specifically coming to mind is, Edie Sedgwick. She was so ahead of her time, fashion forward in all of her glory.

Q: What made you decide to start blogging? 

A: Not many people know this, but I actually started a fashion/travel/lifestyle type of blog back in 2008 or so. I loved doing it, I loved the creative freedom of being able to compartmentalize my thoughts both visually and textually. Then once I was diagnosed with cancer, I began #BSMHB as a way to document everything that was happening in my life. But now I am ready to share a lot of other aspects of myself and my life outside of just cancer; what it is like to be young(ish), up-to-the-minute and pumped with chemo.

Q: Nylon or Vogue?

A: Nylon all the way. I’ve read both for years, but I always seem to connect more with the content amongst everything else that Nylon has to offer as a magazine publication.  Cosmo is also my jam. Sorry,  Anna Wintour.

Q: What are some of your current fashion obsessions?

A: Buttons. Flare. Pin-bling. Everything I own — jacket wise has a button or five on it. CAN’T STOP. WON’T STOP.

Q: What type of camera do you use?

A: An iPhone — I’m not a pro, but I can imagine to be.

Q: What is your dream job?

A: It’s funny, I don’t think I would be able to go back to working for anyone again.  I guess never say never, but I’ve realized I’m better off doing my own thing, freelancing creatively. I’d say Author would be at the top of my list. Anything in the creative realm is a dream, really.

Q: Name your Top 3 favorite bands:

A: Easy — 1) The Beatles 2) Third Eye Blind 3) The Format

Q: Do you prefer music on Vinyl? CD? or Download?

A: Who doesn’t prefer their music on Vinyl? The cracks are the best part. This year I joined the best “box” club called Vinyl Me Please and each month I receive a new vinyl. So far they’ve all been badass and totally exciting to get new music in the post every month.

Q: Favorite makeup brand?

A: I’ve got to say, I’m a MAC girl, through and through. I’ve veered over to Nars, Dior, Urban Decay — you name it, but I always swerve back for MAC. Pharmacy makeup impresses me at times though, i.e.- Rimmel London. Oh yas.

Q: Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn?

A: Sorry, Brigitte Bardot. She’s the ultimate babe in my book — and Jackie O., I love her so.

Q: How many tattoos do you have?

A: If my Nan had been asked this question, she’d say, ‘one too many’. But, I believe I have eight, but most of them are dainty, except for my Hamsa.

Q: Favorite Quote?

A: “You live but once; you might as well make it amusing.” – Coco Chanel

Q: What is one thing your readers would be surprised to hear?

A: Probably my half American/British accent that switches on an off. (lol) — otherwise, I hope my readers continue to enjoy the content and a peek inside the day to day lifestyle of a young cancer chick. #AWARENESS and #STYLE will go hand in hand, just you watch.

E-mail me (link on sidebar) if you have any questions or want to connect!  And watch out for some outfits on the blog.

Big X,



11.30.2015: Pre-Op Video Update

11.30.15 BKO. from Britt Ochoa on Vimeo.

It is safe to say I am fairly numb after today’s visit with one of the surgeons performing my operation on December 3rd, 2015.  My energy levels are pretty low and this is the easiest way for me to communicate with everyone at the moment.  If you’ve messaged, text, called, etc. I’m sorry for not responding — I’ve been a little emotional, as I am sure you can imagine.  But please know your love and kindness has not gone unnoticed.  All thoughts, prayers and good energy is beyond appreciated and I’ll update my blog as soon as possible after surgery on Thursday.

Love forever,

B x

Happy Thanksgiving! 🍗

#Thankful I #BSMHB #BeStillMyHeartBlog I www.BeStillMyHeartBlog.wordpress.com

As we approach the Holiday’s and as we close the month of “thanks”, I now more than ever feel gratitude for so many things, which unlike before I took for granted.  The preceding year has undoubtedly been full of challenges, tests and trials and with each there has been a lesson to be learned and ultimately a greater sense of self and an appreciation for life, including the struggles.  Without which, I would have never been able to get through without the everlasting and abiding support of my ardent family and friends.  I realize that as long as each and every one of them are in existence, I will know what it is to love and be loved, without fail, question or any expectations.

Not but four short months ago my life was forever changed by my cancer diagnosis.  As I have said before in previous notions, I would not change the way things are for anything in the world.  Sadly, it took getting cancer for me to really see things clearly.  Here are some of the things I have learned and have respectively become grateful for through the means of my lucidity and my prognosis.

1)   Each day is a blessing.  Whether you choose to hike Mt. Everest or spend a lazy day in bed; be thankful for the day that was granted to you and enjoy it to the hilt.

2)   You can’t win everyone over.  But when you weigh the amount of friends and family that you have, against the few people that may not like you…it seems incredibly minuscule.  Focus on the positive people in your life and don’t let the negative in and be grateful to those for allowing you to uncover the blind spots so you could become a better person.

3)   Through my chemo, there are intermittent times when I lose my motor skills and ability to speak.  Having the gift of gab, this was and is a huge thing for me.  I am eternally appreciative for the ability to be able to speak and speak my mind at that.

4)   My heart.  Not just because it is full of love and laughter but also because I had a great scare that I may have heart failure and never valued the most important organ in my body before now.  My heart has pumped blood into every part of my body since I was born and has allowed me the gift of being ALIVE and to feel everything that life has to offer.

5)   The beautiful surroundings that we have; the sun, the moon, the sky, the green grass and the air we breathe each day.  To live in a world so beautiful, we should feel so lucky.

6)   The Internet…I know this sounds so silly, but it is truly an amazing invention.  The interweb allows me to share my story and my journey through cancer.  Without which, I would not have an outlet and ability to connect with so many wonderful people who are either inspired by my story, or inspire me through their own trials and tribulations. Connecting with other like-minded individuals is the bees knees.  Thank you, Vint Cerf and the other Founding Fathers of the Internet, you are simply genius.

7)   Health Care Professionals.  What can I say?  I have the BEST team of Doctors, who put my health first and foremost and for showing me that despite my health pitfalls; I can live a quality life beyond compare.

8)   Travel…for letting me see the wanderlust of the world, different cultures and making amazing memories.

9)   My husband, Steve.  He’s a total babe and has defined our relationship by the way he shows his love and continuous encouragement, day in and day out, without a single complaint.  He treats me “normal” and for that, I love him all the more.

10)  Life and life’s challenges.  Life, for experiencing all that I am experiencing and for all of the experiences to come, including the challenges that have taken place and will continue to allow me to grow and become the person I am meant to be.

On that note, Happy Thanksgiving.  Thank you for going on this ride with me and may you and yours enjoy a wondrous Turkey Day.  Now lets all stuff the turkey with Xanax so we can have the most relaxing Thanksgiving Day, ever!


Britt x